Almost every woman we speak to at Over 40 Females expresses the desire to be more spiritual in their lives or to simply learn more about how they can be. Enjoy this blog from all kinds of women showing how they view spirituality and ways you can weave it into your every day life to enhance yourself on a personal or professional level - or both at the same time.
Posted By Administration,
Friday, February 17, 2017
The Essential Truth About How To Do Anything
Believe in yourself. This is something that no one can do for you. It simply has to come from you. Have you done something similar before? Then more than likely you have the bandwidth to do whatever it is that you are pursuing! Never tried it before? The first time you drove a car, or went on a date, or attended college…you never did that before either. How did it go?
Being your own cheerleader is an important ingredient in living the life you most desire. You are the single longest relationship you will ever have. Think about it…at the crossroads of joy and fear is the power of belief…the power of prayer… and the power of something bigger and more vibrant in your life.
Focus on the can. Channel gratitude. We are hard wired to focus on what cannot happen rather than on the possibilities of what can. Gratitude is a major player in positive thinking and in helping you to remain mindful of what you can do rather than all the things you cannot possibly accomplish. Keep a gratitude journal or a success jar to record the good. All the elements of what you have already accomplished add up like the pieces of a mosaic, they come to life when you celebrate the whole picture. Think you can and you will move ahead.
Allow for growth. Growth involves celebration. Growth is the small steps taken toward the larger reward. Growth promotes research, change of plans, exploration, and living in the moment. Growth keeps you mindful of where you are on your own journey. Stepping into doing the thing you most want to achieve means allowing yourself to grow regardless of the end result. Growth is forward action.
Create a vision. Can you see yourself doing what it is you are imagining? What does that look like? How does it make you feel? Visioning is a pathway toward accomplishing what you want. It allows in possibility and wonder. Visioning removes the “how am I ever going to do this” and replaces it with the reason why you want to do something and with imagining the possibilities of all that this vision can be. Visioning keeps you playful and engaged, mindful and creative. Creativity promotes evolution and transformation.
Start. Sounds simple right? If you don’t begin with one small step you never do. It does not matter if you are starting a business or yearning to travel. Wishing does not make things happen. Choice and action make things happen. Buy the sneakers. For those of you who follow my posts and workshops, I often speak about exercise as a go to element of change for people. Everyone thinks that in order to lose weight they need to join a gym. FIRST, you need to buy the sneakers. Then put them on. Then lace them up. Then wear them. Then go for a walk. Then take a class. When you wear out the sneakers a bit…then it is time to join the gym. Begin. Say yes.
Randi Levin CPC, founder & CEO, Randi Levin Coaching—is a transitional life strategist, author, speaker, and reinvention expert. Her core belief is that as women, we have the choice and the power to carve out and curate our own legacy based on embracing our ongoing evolution. In their 20’s women make sweeping life-long decisions that no longer align with a 40, 50, or 65-year-old version of themselves. Utilizing a “what’s next mindset,” Randi applies her Signature GPS Coaching System incorporating growth, purpose, and success to support her clients in pivoting and refreshing their lives so that they best reflect who they are today. She is a contributor and featured expert for Huffington Post, Thrive Global, DivorceForce, The Three Tomatoes, PowHERNetwork and a variety of national publications and podcasts. Her workshops have been featured in The Wall Street Journal and she is a contributing author in the anthology series Get RESULTS!
I believe it is a combination of our life's passions and life's experiences that help define our life's purpose. Some are fortunate enough to stumble upon their purpose early, but I suspect for most of us, it takes a little more living to figure out what really matters.
I'd like to share with you what matters most to me. For many it will surely resonate, for others it will not. No matter, either way I will be satisfied to just raise awareness.
According to both the National Institute of Mental Health and the World Health Organization, one in four people will be affected by mental health or neurological disorders at some point in their lives. My family tree is affected. There I said it. The branches are wide, the roots deep. And it is no fun. But it is real, and I acknowledge it and the ongoing challenges that come with it.
Gratefully, I am finally not alone.
After almost two decades of learning and trying everything I could to help my loved ones, I found something that helped me. NAMI - The National Alliance on Mental Illness.
You see, what matters most to me is to 'end the stigma' associated with anyone living with mental health challenges, as well as for their families who love and care for them. Be they a child or an adult, this starts by just listening…
So if you live with a mental health condition, please repeat after me:
"I promise to speak up and not be SILENT."
And if you love and care for someone who does, please respond in kind:
"I promise to not judge and to just LISTEN.”
Have you ever noticed how 'silent' and 'listen' share the same letters? Funny, isn't it? After all, if we are silent, no one can listen, and if we want to listen, we must be silent.
If you or someone you love struggles with mental health, please know help exists and is within your reach.
Go to http://www.nami.org to find your local affiliate. Learn about their FREE education courses, FREE support groups, FREE advocacy training workshops, and so much more.
Go to http://naminyc.iwilllisten.org Click on PROMISE WALL and share on social media.
"Welcome to the first episode of the callingtherealYOU with your host Pamella Horton! In this episode Pamella shares a few golden nuggets, 11 to be exact, on how to remain grounded and connected to the realYOU during the times we are in. A time of increased separation amongst race, religions, socio economic classes, a time of breakdown and attack.
Find out how when you connect and remain connected with the realYOU you disengage from the co-creation of perceived madness and begin to live according to your birthright, so that you can live a simplified AND abundant life."
Thank you to everyone who helped make this possible.
Erik Horton - I love you and the way you love me. Your belief in me is mind blowing.
Patricia Brooks - Thank you for believing in my work and callingtherealYOU. Thank you for the work that you are doing in the world.
Why Loving What You Want to Change is So Important
By Speaker Board Member Janet D. Thomas
My grandmother was my hero… is my hero. I can still feel her in my heart, and see her in my mind’s eye.
I was in my 20’s (and she in her 80’s) when she said to me, “I still feel young, but when I look in the mirror there’s an old lady staring back at me.” I had not considered anything like that before. It was quite a mind-jolt for me, like when someone says something to you that shifts the way you view life, even if in the slightest way.
I think it was a new concept for me because it suggests at least some level of self-understanding, like comfortably sitting inside yourself with the ability to say, “I know who I am.”
My Nana knew who she was, enough to know that although time was impacting her body, she was still a vibrant young woman in her heart and mind. To me, it’s like knowing who you are — and then agreeing to put on a costume.
I got a deeper understanding of this concept when I was 40. I felt really, really good in my heart and mind, yet when I looked in the mirror there was a fat lady staring back at me.
At that time I realized that, after over 30 years of focused attention, false promises and lots of heartache, I had finally made peace with my costume. Although there was a time (a long, long time actually) when I needed extra weight for protection, it had gotten to the point where I decided I didn’t need it anymore. I felt happy, powerful, protected and “large and in charge!” on the inside, and that’s when I was finally successful with losing weight and keeping it off.
There is a difference between Nana’s costume and my own. It is a fact that time and age impacts all of us whether we like it or not, but our reality is gloriously flexible and will mirror our actions and inactions. In my case, I decided to change it so I could feel more aligned with myself, and that’s exactly what I did.
As I think about it now, 15 years later, I am more and more convinced that embracing ourselves in our entirety – our path, our choices/decisions and their outcomes (both preferred and non-preferred) gives us the most power and freedom to change.
I believe in order to successfully shift something we don’t prefer, it is important to make peace with it first, by honoring it as something that has served us in some way. I believe that once we understand how it was useful to us, by lovingly bidding adieu, we don’t have to wrestle with it anymore.
If we hate it, we have not yet been willing to receive the gifts that are within it for us — there’s still some work to do!
To begin any desired shift, consider opening your imagination to reflect on how it (whatever “IT” is) has served you, and embrace it. From there, you can enjoy amazing realizations to help you transform it, while noticing that people and resources will cross your path to help you get there.
You had a confrontation. Or, more accurately, you got right up close to a confrontation — and punted. You didn’t speak up, didn’t assert yourself, went along with something you did not like or want, possibly even hid your feelings completely and put on a false front of cheer or agreement.
And now all you can think about is what you should have said and/or done.
Well, first, take comfort in the idea that you are not the only one. When publisher CPP Inc. studied conflict at work in 2008, results showed 25 percent of employees said they have actually ditched work to avoid a conflict. And avoiding conflict is not just a problem for women; men who are “agreeable” to avoid conflict can make as much as$10,000 less than ruder men, a 2011 study found.
Clearly, there can be a cost to being nice. But one of the worst tolls might be suffering the internal conversation that starts when we decide to be nice instead of direct, assertive or truthful in our interactions. “I should have told her to stuff it,” your mind says — like, every hour. “I should have said, No way!” Or thoughts to that effect.
So how to become more assertive? Well, first, let’s turn off the critical internal voice that keeps running through those should-have-dones. Yes, maybe there were a dozen other ways to handle the bothersome situation, but ruminating over that after the fact does not serve you.
Shutting down your inner critic can be easy as talking back to it. Thisterrific post on TinyBuddha.com gives guidance for how to silence that nagging little voice in your head: Say ‘so what’ or ‘big deal’ or ‘who cares’ or phrases along those lines when that nattering voice insists one more time that you really should have told your sister she was being incredibly mean about your new haircut.
Practice makes perfect in defusing the critic. TinyBuddha blogger Lynn Newman says you can even identify your critic by name when arguing with it to get the upperhand on runaway critical thoughts.
Then on to how you feel about what happened. Chances are you’re angry (otherwise there’d be no fuss, would there?) Dr. Christiane Northrup has some excellent advice on how to harmlessly release that rage. In aHays 2015 World Summit talk,Northrup suggests taking a terrycloth towel and whacking it against the furniture or woodwork while expressing your (previously unexpressed) rage. Physically releasing anger this way can be absolutely cathartic, Norththrup says. And nobody’s hurt , not even the armchair!
Now, on to what you’re going to do next time. Assertiveness can be tough, especially fornice people. But it needn’t be. Blogger Henrik Edberg maintains the root of assertiveness is respect, for yourself and the other person. Respectful assertiveness isn’t mean or attacking or superior; it simply recognizes that each person has their own needs, points of view and boundaries. When you are assertive, you are respecting your own point of view, your own needs and you are creating you own boundaries, while you refrain from attacking the other’s needs, point of view or boundaries.
Edberg suggests starting your assertive communication with a disarming statement, such as asking permission to talk or thanking the other person for their views.
Say your friend Tracey feels compelled to criticize your decision to lend money to another friend. You’re tired of hearing it and in fact, if you have to listen to it much more, you’re going to blow. Before you do, try this. “Can I say something, Tracey?” Wait for her agreement, then say, “I appreciate that you care about whether Anna will pay me back. This may seem like a big issue to you, but it is not at all important to me. And quite frankly, I don’t want to discuss it anymore.” You offered her respect and drew a boundary.
Assertiveness experts say don’t tackle a mountain on your first few efforts at being more assertive. Baby steps (when a coworker asks where you all should go to lunch, offer an opinion; practice saying ‘no’ to little things and so on) are advised at first. Then you can tackle something big like telling your father to back off with his (unsolicited) advice about your career.
Build your assertiveness muscle, and you will find yourself drawing boundaries and putting your foot down with ease and respect. And you’ll be hearing that mental mantra “what I should have said” a whole lot less.
“It takes a lot of courage to release the familiar and seemingly secure, to embrace the new. But there is no real security in what is no longer meaningful.” ~ Margaret Stortz
Those bold enough to claim the life they want will risk leaving the known even if it makes them incredibly uncomfortable. When we want to make a substantive change in our life, courage is required to move into uncharted waters. Some of us prefer to dip a toe, others wade in, and some take the plunge. We leave our comfort zone behind, which seems to feel safe and predictable, but over time has grown stale.
We gain access to the power of our courage by connecting to the truth in our heart. The word courage comes from the old French word “cuer,” meaning heart. We claim and commit to “What” is important to us without having to know “How” it will happen. Many times there is some inner work to be done in order to move forward. It matters that we are willing to discover, engage, and explore our next steps. The more connected we are to our intuition, the easier it is to live with the unknown. We trust that it will emerge in ways that expand our lives.
In paying attention to what is present, we recognize the opportunities, the innate timing, and the synchronicities that are unfolding. Often what we want comes to us in surprising ways. We may be given various options that assist us in clarifying and refining what is best for us. Sometimes what we want shows up unexpected, disguised, or packaged differently then we imagined. Our hearts will know when a choice, a person, or an outcome feels right.
About Susan C. Boone MBA, MS
Susan Boone has been a professional helping people since the early 1980s. She earned her MBA from the University of Louisville and went on to attend Georgia State University where she received her Master's degree in counseling (Magna Cum Laude). Susan's passion for helping women began when she became a psychotherapist. Today, Susan works with 'Women Over 40' who have had professional success in their life, yet they yearn for something deeper and more fulfilling. Through her work, Susan teaches women how to find clarity, self-love and become the well loved women they deserve.
To contact Susan, she can be reached at (404) 272-0725 or by email email@example.com. To read more about Susan and her offerings, visitwww.susanboonecoaching.com
The new age used to be an underworld, the province of dubious gurus, strange thinkers, sad seekers and the occasional outright whack job. Or at least that’s how it looked to conventional thinkers.
But now, the cultural creatives who adhere to — and propagate — new age thinking are household names: Oprah Winfrey, Dr. Wayne Dyer, Deepak Choprah, Joel Osteen. Thanks to a book and movie called The Secret, everybody knows about the law of attraction. If the new age gets knocked down by a skeptical onslaught, it gets right back up, bringing more speakers, authors and teachers to the table.
What is the secret of The Secret and its brethren? Hope. Positivity. The power of believing in yourself, others and a greater good. And can any of that be bad?
If you want to practice the power of positive reading, here are four good choices.
You Can Heal Your Life
This book by Louise Hay has a permanent spot among Amazon’s best-selling spiritual titles, even though it was written in 1984. A simple, loving book by a woman who now heads an empire of new age publishing, You Can Heal Your Life offers the message that as you think, you create. If that is a scary proposition — you know what a messy, negative thought soup you have sloshing around in your head — Hay offers hope: The point of change is always in the present moment. If you want more lovely present moments, this book points the way.
Energy Squared: 9 Do-It-Yourself Experiments that Prove Your Mind Creates Your Reality
Pam Grout seems like the farthest thing from a guru. I mean, she writes for People magazine. Her two Energy best-sellers are the anti-thesis of the heavy breathing dramatics of The Secret (“There’s something out there no one wants you to know…”) but she is farming the same patch: Mind makes matter. This is a book full of faith in what Grout variously calls The Dude and the Field of Potential, the universe’s benevolent energy that is there for the using (and which in fact, according to Grout , we are using it every day whether we know it or not).
In a brilliant move, she has devised simple experiments so disbelievers can take the power of positive thinking/law of attraction/Field of Potential for a test drive. Read Energy Squared and you will receive unexpected windfalls (mine was $2500), see more sunset beige vehicles than you thought existed and receive a message from an old friend, among other stuff. All in a day’s work for the F of P. What’s wonderful about Grout is her total lack of pretension. The new age has a new voice — and it’s talking just like us.
10% Happier: How I Tamed the Voice in My Head, Reduced Stress Without Losing My Edge, and Found Self-Help That Actually Works–A True Story
ABC newsman Dan Harris has a message for the skeptical: Meditation works, and it’s not just for the enlightened few. In this memoir of his career as a network news reporter, Harris outlines a life stressed to the max — by world events and personal predilection. After an on-air meltdown, Harris went in search of answers — and discovered meditation. “Until recently, I thought of meditation as exclusively the province of bearded swamis, unwashed hippies and fans of Jon Tesch music,” he writes. Instead, he found a world of professional, successful athletes and businessmen quietly tuning out with meditation– to keep their edge, not lose it.
Ask and It Is Given: Learning To Manifest Your Desires
Esther and Jerry Hicks
Esther and Jerry Hicks wrote persuasively about the law of attraction in this best seller. The book has 20 processes or visualizations to help you identify blocks to your own good and tap into the secret of manifesting what you desire in life. (I especially liked No. 20, where you hand over the tough parts to an all-capable manager.) This is No. 7 in a series of books on this topic by the Hicks, who channel the teachings of an entity they call Abraham. If you are a skeptic about channeling, entities or the law of attraction, you will have to suspend disbelief to get any benefits.
Posted By Beth Mercante,
Monday, January 4, 2016
Updated: Wednesday, March 30, 2016
The start of a New Year is a great time to assess where you are regarding an intimate relationship and where you would like to be. Are you seeking a spiritual equal, a person you can learn from and grow with?
Have you worked hard on being the best "you" possible, but still face challenges in your personal relationships? Have you worked diligently on personal growth and self-awareness? Those of us who consider ourselves spiritually seeking still desire companionship that is fulfilling, enriching and inspiring. Being comfortable with your own “self” opens the door to allowing nurturing and loving relationships to enter.
Valentine’s Day is right around the corner. There are many “spiritual singles” who are working relentlessly on their spiritual growth, releasing past betrayals, pain and healing from old trauma and associations.
So, where is your spiritual partner? There may be some hidden blockages or resistance to opening one’s self to joyous, healthy and loving relationships. You may be well aware of this resistance, but have not yet figured out how to address and release it.
When you request an Angel Card relationship reading, you are seeking the guidance of the Romance Angels! These cherubs specialize in love and offer gentle messages on opening your heart and mind to the facets of love and loving. All relationships require trust, honesty and communication in order to flourish and blossom.
Doreen Virtue offers Angelic Affirmations For Romantic Love. This meditation is about 10 minutes long and well worth the time out. If this is of interest to you, please check out the link below:
Posted By Beth Mercante,
Thursday, November 19, 2015
Updated: Wednesday, March 30, 2016
While reading the book Wild by Cheryl Strayed, I was going through a time in my life that left me wondering where I was going next. A part of me wanted to leave my family for a month and hike my home state, Oregon, to reconnect with myself. Well, that didn't happen but I did take steps to "find" myself again through yoga, meditation and introspection.
As the Chief Operating Office of Over 40 Females, I often hear amazing stories of members finding themselves again after years of child rearing and homemaking. Each time I hear one of these stories, whether it be at a live event or on our online events, I always feel inspired to continue my journey of self-improvement and growth. This interview of Reese Witherspoon, Cheryl Strayed,Laura Dern and Bruna Papandrea shows how so many women are seeking growth and healing often through their lives. There is a moving part of the interview talking about Cheryl Strayed's intense love of her mother and I know I would love my children to talk about me this same way.
Posted By Judy Goss,
Friday, October 9, 2015
Updated: Wednesday, March 30, 2016
In our 24/7, high tech life, how in the world is an ambitious entrepreneur supposed to stay focused and on track each day? Figuring out and then REMEMBERING what’s important to do each day in your business can be tricky. Want to know the SECRET to staying on time and on task?
I’m going to share with you THE MOST IMPORTANT of all of the tactics that I have found over my 20 years of entrepreneurial endeavors. But first, let me ask you one simple question:
Do you roll out of the bed at the last minute and start scrambling from the word ‘go’?
…or maybe you’re one who gets up early, but then do you use that time to cram in all the stuff you didn’t get to the day before…like catch up on email or read the headlines?
I understand. I really do. As I said I’m the CEO of a household of NINE living creatures, But…THE MOST IMPORTANT tool I have found to keep things moving (in the direction I want, most of the time) is to actually take a few minutes to be still. Let me repeat that: In order to keep things MOVING you must be STILL. What in the world do I mean by that?Get out of bed, sit somewhere, and practice being STILL and SILENT.
“Well, what do I do during that time?” my clients ask. I say, “NOTHING.” Listen to the silence, to the space between your thoughts. “BUT WHY?” they ask. BECAUSE THAT’S WHERE YOUR ANSWERS LIE. They do NOT lie in the busy-ness of your day. They do not lie in DOING more. Trust me. Everything you’re looking for – ideas, decisions, clarity – will sort themselves out if you simply stop long enough to BE STILL and QUIET at the beginning of each day.
Now you may be thinking “I took time to read this so you could tell me to “be still?!” Yes - I am here to tell you that those who work with me over time…they ALL end up finding THEIR version of QUIET and STILLNESS as well as their answers on how to move forward. For some it’s breathing, or formal meditation…for others it’s prayer…It doesn’t matter WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE FOR YOU…JUST DO IT.
I’ve even had several high level muckity mucks at Yale University who were very skeptical at first get into a regular practice of stillness each day. And they swear it has transformed not only their work but also their lives.
After you’ve had about as much silence as you can handle (warning: it is ADDICTIVE), set your intention for the day.
You do this by asking yourself: “what are the two most important things I must move forward today” and picture yourself getting these things done.
You see your business (or your life) is NOT built overnight, but it IS built by one INTENTIONAL day after another. You string enough of those together over time, and you’ll be that much closer to getting the results you desire.
So you’ve set your day up right through stillness and setting intentions, and now you have to reduce the noise throughout your day and maintain the calm, clarity and focus.
Here is a quick tip to do that - there are more outlined in the free report off of my website, but briefly:
MANAGE THE ELECTRONIC LEASH BEFORE IT STRANGLES YOU!
STOP checking email all day long. Unless you’re an oncologist or a day trader, it can wait. We think it makes us feel alive to be constantly in touch, but in fact it zaps our focus and energy. YOU need to control IT; not the other way around. Studies show it takes 20 minutes to get back on track once you’ve been interrupted.
Try to unplug completely at some point in the day. In the evening. Definitely when with the family. (Do you really want to teach your kids to half listen while they check their phone?)
To arrange for a private, complimentary consult designed to boost your earnings, drop me a line at firstname.lastname@example.org. I’m passionate about helping you become spiritually and financially empowered by making GOOD money doing what you love!
Posted By Administration,
Monday, September 7, 2015
Updated: Wednesday, March 30, 2016
Guest blog post by freelance writer Tara Heath:
Perhaps you are a driven career woman; maybe you are a full-time mom – or maybe you’re both.
No matter what it is that you are doing each day, the hustle and bustle of your everyday life catches up with you. Sometimes you are so busy that the sun has set and you are going back to bed, but it seems like your alarm clock only rang a few minutes ago. Ah, life.
With so much going on, it is easy to get stressed out. It’s only natural to feel dizzy when you’re being pulled in a million different directions. There has to be some way to get a grip on things and to find a sense of balance, calm and peace of mind. The good news is – there is! The answer: yoga.
Yoga is an excellent way to tune out the rest of the world, to focus on you, find your center, and just regroup. Not only is this ancient exercise extremely therapeutic for the mind, but it is also very beneficial to the body. No wonder so many people are die-hard yogis. It’s not just a fad; yoga really does provide some pretty impressive healing powers.
When you begin to feel like the amount of things on your to-do list is longer than the time you have in a day, your mind starts feeling like it is never fully engaged. Jumping from one task to another, making plans in your head-suddenly, you’re missing out on the joys of the present moment.
One of the core components of yoga is breathing. Concentrating on your breathing helps bring your mind to center, which allows you to be aware of where you are now, not five minutes from now. This transcends beyond the actual act of yoga into your daily life and helps you deal with life’s stresses and pressures more effectively and healthily.
Energizes the Body, Mind and Spirit
Not only does a busy schedule affect your day-to-day moments, it will eventually catch up to you, causing you to feel run down and worn out. Yoga is a simple way to take small amounts of time out of your day, and just breathe.
While participating in the exercises and breathing techniques that are associated with yoga, you are actually meditating and concentrating on your inner mind and body. Believe it or not, this helps boost energy, in a way that is much more effective and good for you than drinking tons of coffee.
Strengthens the Body
You’ve probably seen images of yogis doing what seems like ridiculously impossible stretches and bends – and you are probably thinking that there is no way that you could ever possibly get your body even remotely close to those positions. Well, think again. True, some people who practice yoga are naturally flexible; however, most of them gain it from repetitive participation in this art form.
Yoga requires you to stretch, bend and use various muscles. While you may not see huge gains in a short period of time, if you are patient and stick to it, you will build up strength in your body, which is good for your overall health.
There is no denying the awesome benefits of yoga. No wonder people have been practicing it for generations. Find out the benefits for yourself - start practicing today and as your physical and mental health improve, you will feel much more balance and calm in your life.
Tara Heath is a freelance writer in Southern California. She spends her time covering beauty and health topics, and often contributes to the Presidio Home Care blog.
Posted By Beth Mercante,
Thursday, January 22, 2015
Updated: Sunday, February 15, 2015
Guest blog post by by Dr. Donna Martuge, Ed.D, C.M.F.W.
I remember the exact moment, you know that moment in time that is beyond anything you ever imagined possible.
My day started like a normal work day, which was never predictable or normal by any standard. I was Executive Director of Special Education and Pupil Support in one of New York's largest school districts. Work had been very stressful, as had life in general as a single mom, career woman, friend, family member and you name the many roles we each play in our lives. We have too many hats to count nowadays.
It was a fall afternoon around 2:00 pm when I left a school in the district and drove to my office to have a conversation with the Superintendent of schools. He handed me a letter from a parent and asked if I can help with an upset parent. This was part of what I did, as I always enjoy working with parents and families and have always been great at facilitating change.
This moment was different. It was different because I couldn’t read the letter. I looked at the letter and thought I must just be exhausted the words were grey and blurry. I rubbed my eyes and tried to focus. I could not see the words, I could not make out a single word. My hands started to shake and I realized something beyond my comprehension was happening right this very moment. My supervisor noted that I did not look good and I said “I don’t feel good, I can’t see, Im not good. I lost 30 pounds, Im shaking, I can’t see.” I remember asking him to read the letter to me. I do not remember a word of the letter. I later found out people could not understand me either. I thought I was speaking, I was not moving the right side of my face.
When I had gotten home my family took me to the doctor immediately. The days that followed were filled with tests, doctors, possible diagnoses and me feeling like I was not part of what was happening. In some sense it seemed far away from me. Over the course of the next few months I was offered several diagnoses, Multiple Sclerosis, Mini-Stroke, Lymes Disease, or a rare type of migraine disorder where you can have seizures and your sight is impacted. The funny thing is, nothing any doctor said resonated with me at all.
I was getting worse. I was sensitive to sound and light. I spent weeks with no television or lights on and began developing intense anxiety if I heard sound. The phone would ring and it was like a screeching on a chalkboard in my universe at that time. I would get so anxious that someone may want me talk, and I would try and they wouldn’t be able to understand me. I didn’t answer my phone anymore. Besides I was tired of people asking if anything changed and me be angry and frustrated I had nothing positive to say, me the one everyone called for support and positive words!
As time went on I felt isolated, depressed and for quite awhile I felt alone, hopeless and helpless and even let my family know I had planned on giving up. I felt so useless unable to take care of myself and my daughter. It was at that point my mom said please try something that sounds crazy, I just have a feeling about it get your "Bars" run.
"Bars" refers to Access Bars™ founded by Gary Douglas where you touch 32 points on the head and it shifts and changes energy. Similar to acupuncture or acupressure yet works quickly, dynamically to release stress and create change faster then any modality I had ever known. I agreed to give it try before I gave up on living, in part so my mom would not feel guilty for any of my choices.
After one session I no longer felt like I wanted to die, I also did not feel like I wanted to live. I felt like something was possible that I could not touch or explain. I continued going for sessions and some of the pain, the headaches had gone and so was my depression related to feeling helpless. I had many questions about the process and wanted to know more.
I spent the next year learning every energy healing process I could get my hands on, and I mean every thing I can learn. After working with Access Processes and the Founders of Access Gary Douglas and Dain Heer I was able to speak, see, laugh, and live life. How I lived my life gave the term “follow the energy” a whole new meaning for me. I opened my own coaching, speaking and energy healing practice and continued to learn everything I can about many different modalities.
In hindsight I see I always had a knowing about energy and healing. I communicated with those who had passed since I was four. I read tarot cards for a living from ages 15-22 and at some point decided working as a psychologist was more acceptable in this reality then working as a psychic. I cut myself from my own awareness in so many places in my life for many years. When I went to Gary Douglas and asked him for help he said “You are one of the greatest seers I have ever met, what are you refusing to see that if you saw it would give you your life?” When he asked me that I literally could not breath.
I did refuse to see. I am a medium, psychic, and phenomenal at creating change with energy, and I cut myself off from my gifts, talents and abilities to “fit in” by someone else’s standards. As I began to acknowledge all the places I had judged as wrongness in me, I also began to heal in was more dynamic then I ever imagined possible. I also became more aware of how to tap into where my clients cut themselves off and get in their own ay and facilitate change in the energy that keeps them stuck. I actually was always able to do it, my unwillingness to acknowledge my abilities created quite a bit of havoc in my life.
How does this snippet of my life apply to you? Well, I believe we all are aware, intuitive, have our knowing. However that shows up for you, it is there. It was when I followed my knowing that life expanded even more for me. I could have bought a doctors diagnosis, taken medications and kept looking for what works. However, I could not find two doctors to come up with the same diagnosis and nothing resonated with me. I am absolutely not saying don’t trust doctors. I am asking “what would it take for you to trust you?” Trust you to keep looking until something clicks for you and trust your gut feeling, intuition, your knowing. If you don’t think you have it, then pop in and take one of my psychic development classes. You will be amazed at how intuitive you truly are.
I now have clients all over the world who have come with depression, anxiety, attentional difficulties, sleep difficulties, and more then 90% of them after 12 weeks reduce or eliminate medication, working with their medical doctors and myself.
I work with clients doing phone sessions who feel confused, unclear, in a spot in life where they are not sure what to choose and offer coaching and use the techniques I have learned throughout my life and they gain clarity and create their desired results with more ease and speed then they ever imagined possible.
I teach people all over the world how to connect with their own capacities and abilities and use them to their advantage so they can have more ease and joy in their lives.
Most importantly through everything I do I empower others to know that they know and offer them tools to use to help them everyday. In my coaching, classes, sessions, speaking events my target is to empower others and guide them to what they know. The way I see it, the more this happens, the happier people can be and happiness can change the world!
I am blessed to say I spend everyday of my life helping people feel more ease, and joy in their lives without years and years of talk therapy. I now have my own techniques and tools I use to help people create change, not give up, and get to a new possibility. It is important for me to let you know this blog is by no means supporting any specific modality.This is my story for you and it is about trusting that you know what is right for you. Ask yourself, follow your knowing, and remember what ever you are going through it is for this moment in time, each moment there is change and one day you look back and you are past it. One moment in time at a time.
Posted By Judy Goss,
Wednesday, January 7, 2015
Updated: Sunday, February 15, 2015
Submitted by Guest Author Uma Girishfrom our Over 40 Females Chicago Chapter:
I had a silly argument with my husband this morning. Tears sprang to my eyes. But instead of blaming and shaming, I paused.
I closed my eyes and connected with my heart space. Then I said, “I don’t want to blame you. I’m just having a weak moment. Please forgive me.”
And, just like that, the conflict dissolved.
Am I as generous every time we have a disagreement? No.
Do I always own up to my part in the mess we’ve created? Not every time.
Have I gotten better at The Pause? Most definitely.
Spirituality is easy—when we practice it in retreats, workshops and spas. It’s wonderful when we’re surrounded by like-minded girlfriends who douse themselves in natural, organic skincare products, burn sage and wear crystals. It’s a piece of cake to spout wise witticisms in a Health & Wellness lecture room. Unfortunately, spirituality needs to come off the mountaintops and out of the caves.
No matter where we learn it, we need to flex our spiritual muscles and tone our tempers in the laboratory of life.
Meditation is not about getting away from our monkey-mind and achieving monk-mind. It is about coming alive to the magical moments that abound in our lives by simply being present.
It is exciting to be a spiritual tourist and sample the fare from a wisdom buffet: A Zen retreat followed by a Reiki Master certification, workshops at the Omega Institute and Super Soul Sundays with Oprah.
But the real work happens in kitchen and bedrooms and the teenager’s messy closet.
Spirituality is the ability to remain calm when you’re stuck in a traffic snarl.
·Spirituality is remembering to connect with your breath when your teenager is mouthing off and doing the exaggerated eye-roll.
·Spirituality is zipping your lips when you’re so very tempted to have the last word.
·Spirituality is saying “thank you” even when the mean, sullen checkout clerk does everything in her power to piss you off.
·Spirituality is sending a silent blessing to the insensitive jerk who cuts you off in a meeting.
If we’re not able to practice in infuriating, nerve-wracking, exhausting life moments, then when? I love Rumi’s words: “If you are irritated by every rub, how will you be polished?”
The challenge is to allow ourselves to be polished a little more each time life rubs us the wrong way. And to shine a sliver of peace and goodwill so that someone’s journey is a little easier.
That is where our real work lies. Not in temples and churches and Energy Healing workshops.
Aleta St. James, an internationally renowned energy healer, that I have personally had the honor of working with recently in my quest for higher spirituality and success in my life, posted an mp3 you should listen to of how she is "winding up and not down." She is turning 67 years old this week and is a single mom of twins that are going to be ten years old this week also. Enjoy this recording and let me know how YOU are rebooting your energy!
BIO: Aleta St. James, internationally acclaimed author of Life Shift: Let Go and Live Your Dream, has been described as the Indiana Jones of the soul, traveling the globe in her own spiritual quest, sharing her renowned healing gifts with thousands of people throughout the world in seminars, workshops and private sessions. Aleta has been interviewed by some of the most notable journalists of our time, including Katie Couric and Diane Sawyer and has been featured on The Today Show, NBC's Dateline, Good Morning America and CNN. In recognition of living her "winding up and not down" philosophy, Aleta was recently named one of AARP Magazine's "people who inspire." Perhaps most famously, Aleta made worldwide news in 2004 when she became the oldest woman in America at the time to give birth her twins, Gian and Francesca at age 57.
Posted By Administration,
Friday, November 28, 2014
Updated: Sunday, February 15, 2015
I will be the first to admit it. I am much too hard on myself. My friends tell me all the time that I constantly fret over trying to be perfect.
And then I realized that me criticizing how I am is not helping me evolve into a better person - that the very fact that I don't like being a perfectionist is the result of me being one. Ugh. After going through two lay-off’s in a row during the recession, my husband’s business going bankrupt and getting foreclosure notices while trying to raise twin toddlers, I should know that I have come a long way since then (only a few years!) and that the path that I am on now is a result of those experiences.
So how do I tone down my voices of criticism? I meditate and practice expanding my creativity by slowing down to appreciate more things along the way. I once thought slowing down was a sign of weakness, now I realize it is necessary to succeed. As women, we don't celebrate ourselves enough. The sooner you start looking at yourself from a different perspective and embracing who you are in totality (your 20-something ego to the age you are now), the sooner you too will come up with answers to get where you need to go.
Appreciating where you are in the now is a simple concept, but not one that is easy to master. I still haven't, but when I start to beat myself up for not being where I want to be at this point in my life, I look back and think "but look how far you have come" - and I smile and enjoy the present. Because I wouldn’t be where I am without the things I have accomplished, and at this point in our lives it is time to celebrate TODAY, and start doing here and now.
Mama Love can be viewed as many different versions of love, not just limited to mothers and their children. Happy Mother's Day to all the mothers out there, whether you have children or pets or are doting Aunties or perhaps have someone that you care for and love unconditionally. And don't forget the step-Moms also :)
As women, we are natural nurturers, and the ability we have to care for and love is truly miraculous. My radio show on Mother's Day for 2014 on "What Women Want" is about that "Mama Love" and how we can get those "imperfectly perfect" relationships with our daughters with advice straight from kids who feel like their Moms have all the right stuff. I figure that if we want to have the best relationship that we can with our daughters, who better to ask then the offspring themselves?
Posted By Administration,
Tuesday, January 7, 2014
Updated: Sunday, February 15, 2015
YOU NEED TO CLEAN YOUR SLATE FOR 2014
Spiritual Center Guest blog by Over 40 Females National Member Michelle D. Smith
Chaos comes from disorderly thinking or a lack of appropriate planning. Clutter fills your life with meaningless “things” sucking up space and energy. Prior to the New Year, have a plan to de-clutter your life. Clear out your living space before you make your annual resolutions. It is likely by clearing out your home, you may not need those resolutions at all. You will know exactly what your year will look like.
To be effective, there needs to be a real commitment to how the clutter will be removed and how long this will take. As an approximation, I would suggest a maximum of one week per room.
Eradicating clutter, trash and what is no longer useful is a purposeful activity. Engage all of your senses and unplug from your phone and Internet. Now I am not saying "don’t answer your phone," what I am advising is to be mindful of using distractions to avoid doing the task at hand.
Clearing and cleaning your home works on the physical, emotional and spiritual planes. It is not just cleaning; it is purification, a way to start fresh.
Reflect on this as time with yourself and your “stuff.” As you clean, become aware of not only what you have, but why you have it.
There are a few significant aspects to this process. First, there is no wrong or right way to clear/clean your space. Permit yourself the freedom to find out what works for you on every level. How long the process takes is flexible as long as you commit to completing the process. Pledge to clear every room. My prediction is after you completely clear and clean your first room it will feel so amazing, you will want to keep moving!
Be mindful in your clearing. You are not just discarding belongings; you are releasing what no longer serves your life now. The fact that something has served you well is indeed to be cherished and appreciated. Not everything will be discarded or donated. There are numerous items, particularly clothes, hand bags and household items you may be able to sell. Even a few dollars in exchange for an item that has completed its function and is now moving on to serve another is a windfall.
Listen to your own judgment and intuition. Be aware of what draws your attention, and how that item makes you feel. I certainly have kept things that fell outside the three year window. Use your own judgment. The only hard and fast rule is: Does this item bring you joy and do you feel gorgeous every time you wear it or see it? If your answer is yes, yes and YES, then please keep that item!
Work on one room at a time, when that room is done, celebrate the victory, light some incense and revel in the new flow of energy. Great job!
So, for a short overview of how I altered the energy in my home, I started in the basement. The basement has been associated with what is hidden in our lives. Even when we have a magnificent basement, there usually is at least one room that is filled with discarded stuff. Be particularly careful to clear and clean the corners of each room. Cluttered corners restrict the flow of energy, and freeing the energy in your residence is one of the side effects of truly clearing your space.
My basement still had junk from the prior owners. They actually built the basement bedroom and bathroom around things that could not be taken out without breaking the items apart. Luckily, I had someone willing to bash everything to pieces and we took out garbage that had been in my home for 15 years. The sensation in the basement was amazing, like the entire house exhaled.
As I moved to the first floor, I started in my dining room/office. There was so much paper that needed shredding, old receipts, business cards, product from ventures I never sold, all had to go. Again, I paid very close attention to the corners and threw away several bags of trash and recycled two bags of shredded paper.
My bedroom was more personal, with many more decisions. I cleared every space in my room. This included bookcases and dressers. All were cleared, dusted and waxed. Seeing my new space gave me immense joy. I have a full length mirror on the back of my closet door that has never seen the light of day. I cleared and cleaned that corner and closed my closet door. A Mirror! Wow! Now my bedroom feels spacious and loving.
Have fun with this time. I played music, drank some wine and usually pulled everything out that needs going through. This can be the cabinets in the kitchen or the drawers in your bedroom. When everything is out in the open, you have no alternative other than getting to work!
As you move through your home, you will feel the flow of energy increase. Pay attention and work accordingly. The benefits of this process are quite astonishing and long lasting. My sister who has been to my house numerous times reacted as if I had gone out and purchased new furniture. She told me the house looked terrific, but in reality, the house was the same. The energy of the house had changed.
There is one final twist in my delicious journey of cleaning, clearing and self discovery. Upon concluding the attic, I wished to celebrate by smudging. The sage and incense were downstairs, so I ran down to get them. Returning to the attic to ignite the sage, I glimpsed a sparkling dolphin, sitting in a spot that was empty just minutes ago. Where in the world did a dolphin come from? Come on, angels, surely you can do better than this. I need some CASH, so how about some Benjamins? The dolphin was a message that I still had work to do, in my case, writing a memoir. Your message will be different, but should be just as personal and unmistakable. Be open to receiving your personal message and then act on the guidance you receive.
May 2014 bless you in more ways than imaginable! Starting a New Year within a clear and loving space, opens the door to attract more of the same into your life. Happy New Year!
Michelle D. Smith owns several websites including a spiritual blog, relationship site and online dating sites. Her current passions are writing and doing angel card readings.http://www.YourSpiritualGarden.com
Posted By Administration,
Friday, October 18, 2013
Updated: Saturday, October 4, 2014
Guest blog post by Christine Faucher-Kelley of Luminance Coaching:
Imagine what it must have been like for our ancestors when they looked up at Mercury and saw it moving backwards! While not as dramatic as a total eclipse of the Sun, astrologers no doubt predicted an evil time. But what does it really mean for us today?
Retrace Your Steps... You ever “retrace your steps” to understand something better? Well, when Mercury appears to be going backwards from our perspective on Earth, that’s what it’s asking us to do: go back, reflect, revisit, contemplate... Mercury wants us to re-explore what we have been overlooking. This is why getting anything “started” at this time is not suggested.
That’s not to say that anything begun during this time is automatically “doomed”. Meditation, journalling practices or anything reflective are good to start now. But other things may be a waste of time or money.
An example might help... A couple of years ago, (and a few days before a Mercury Rx) my husband and I went on vacation in Florida where we were approached by a “time-share” salesperson. (As a New Yorker (and an astrologer!), I should’ve known that if it seemed too good to be true, it probably was.)
Yeah, well... We wound up buying the timeshare and while we now have access to some nice vacations, it’s become a bit of an albatross: expensive, limiting in its scope, and riddled with red-tape. A perfect example of what not to do during a retrograde... (Hey, maybe that’s why I did it, so I could share this story with You!)
If you’ve got to sign... So, if you’ve absolutely got to sign (or close) something during this time, here are some tips:
1. Examine all details and fine print minutely. 2. Get it approved by a lawyer or a professional familiar with this type of contract or document. 3. Where you can, have an escape clause or something that allows you to revisit the document later should that prove necessary. 4. Stall. When possible, take it as far as you can and keep exploring until November 10th. 5. Commit yourself to this being an arrangement that will always need clear communication. 6. Look for the lesson. This situation is teaching you something important. What is it?
In the water sign of Scorpio, Mercury Rx it’s asking us to re-examine the quality of our lives by bringing deeper truths up from the depths for healing in the light.
By astrological sign, let’s take a peek at what area of your life this Mercury Rx is asking you to bring into the light (for a deeper dive, go to www.LuminanceCoaching.com/blogenergetics):
Aries: Deep Inner Work & Shared Finances: It’s time to go deep and explore what needs to be brought into the light so it can heal your shared “stuff”. Where is your personal truth being neglected such that it’s affecting this area? Explore & understand your feelings, but don’t sign anything until after November 10th.
Taurus: Marriage, Partnership, “Others”: When important things get left unsaid they fester. What haven’t you revealed to your partner that would increase the intimacy of your relationship? Power struggles mask the truth: what needs to come out? Come November 10th, “get real”.
Gemini: Work & Health: Power plays at work can begin to manifest in your body as some kind of sickness. (You could just be “run down”.) What deeper truths have you been hiding from yourself that are showing up in your health? Start caring for yourself now, but make some more serious moves after November 10th.
Cancer: Creativity, Children & Romance: Are you hiding behind, or living vicariously through, your children or your romances? If you’ve been stuck, it could be because you’re not owning your creativity. Manipulating others into providing what’s yours to give diminishes you. Be prepared to shine when Mercury goes Direct.
Leo: Home & Private Life: What unexplored deeper truths are affecting the quality of your life at Home. If learned, or old behaviors, are laying in the shadows of your “inner home,” explore how they may be brought into the light and released. Contemplate what “home” means to you and prepare totake action after November 10th.
Virgo: Communication, Siblings & Immediate Family: Reflect on what unexplored deeper truths are affecting the quality of your communications with siblings and immediate family. Running at a frantic pace may cause your truth to be lost in translation. What do you want these people to know? To get more connected, speak up after November 10th.
Libra: Personal Belongings, Finances, Values: Your body may be the best interface to understanding what’s “yours”. Get out of your head and listen to what truth your body is wanting you to know about the quality of your health or finances. The information is there... listen, and by November 10th, be prepared to take a stand.
Scorpio: Your Personal Expression: What old, worn out ways of being have become a disguise behind which you hide your deeper truths? How is hiding your truth affecting your life? Tap into your creativity to increase your expression and allow greater connection. If it doesn’t reflect who you are, step away from it on November 10th.
Sagittarius: Go within… A time of deep reflection and meditation. How are your hidden motivations impacting your quality of life? Dream exploration through journalling may shine a light on what hidden truth is wanting to surface. On November 10th get honest: keeping secrets from yourself only undermines your trustworthiness.
Capricorn: Groups, organizations and goals… How is the group mind affecting your personal goals?What cultural beliefs mask your deeper truths? Old associates may return to bring clarity. Reconsider how your goals and dreams could transform the group and communicate them after November 10th.
Aquarius: Career… Where is your career affecting the quality of your life? Mundane career patterns in your day-to-day life may be blocking your growth. It’s time to explore your deeper needs so you can have the impact you’re really wanting. Reflect on a more authentic career expression by early-November.
Pisces: Higher Education, Distant Travel: Pull back. Where has your focus been too narrow and how is that affecting the quality of your life? Broaden your horizons for clarity on what’s true for you: more education? Travel? Or simply exploring your own mind will expand your awareness to reveal a deeper truth. Come early-November, take that journey.
Posted By Administration,
Wednesday, August 21, 2013
Updated: Saturday, October 4, 2014
Dr. Wendy Kaveney
Love is the most powerful, magnetic, and attractive force in the universe. This force resides as a pure, powerful energy within you.
When you activate this energy, you experience more loving and healthier relationships, inner peace, radiant health, abundant wealth, and whatever your heart desires.
So why don’t we consistently activate this energy and live from this place all the time?
Partially because we have been so conditioned to living in the antithesis of love, fear. It is what I like to call “unlove.” We make all decisions, choices, judgments, and behaviors based in either love or unlove. Whatever energy we reside in when we make those choices is the one that expands.
As women we can be pretty hard on ourselves. We often think about everyone else before ourselves and we can easily see the good in others yet often neglect to see it in ourselves.
Once we do take ourselves into consideration, are we doing that from love? Do we ask, “Does my beauty shine in this dress?” When we ask a question in this fashion we are acknowledging our beauty and want to accentuate it and allow it to shine, which means we are coming from a place of love.
Instead, many of us ask, “Do I look fat in this dress?” and look for things to criticize. When we ask a question like this, we are already in a negative vibration coming from a place of unlove. We are judging ourselves and assuming others will judge us as well, lowering our self-worth and that of people around us.
As a society we have the wrong definition of love. We think that it is an emotion, which may be partly right, as emotions are simply energy in motion. We believe, however, that love is something someone brings TO us, therefore they can take it away. The reality is we are love and love is the truth of our being. When we have the experience of love it, it simply means it has been activated within us. Therefore; we need to be grateful for every love we have ever felt as it was the catalyst to unlocking that particular love within us.
When women say we want to experience more love in our relationships, men immediately think we are talking about sex. We have confused the emotions of relationship with love. This philosophy of love needs to be reversed!
Love is seeing the good and divine, or the potential of the good and divine, in us, others, and all of life. This is a workable definition that I have adopted from my master teacher, Brother Ishmael Tetteh.
By seeing the good in ourselves first, it is much easier to then see it in others.
So from which place are we making our decisions, and what can we do to shift our energy into the power of love?
Do you remember when you felt magnificently in love? You were on top of the world. You let people cut in line at the store. You held the door open for someone. You might have let someone go in front of you in traffic. All these behaviors happened because you were in the love vibration; you experienced the energy that anything was possible and achievable, and you were never diminished. Everyone around you benefited from the love you felt.
Love is a power you can feel and use but cannot touch. Love is, therefore, spiritual. It comes from within and increases you: your capacity to be more of the good you are. Love is absolute energy of good and that is why when you are in love, you do good things for yourself and all around you.
So how can this help you in business?
When we become aware of the various choices and decisions we make, we can allow the emergence of our true self, the one that is loving, positive, happy, joyful, intelligent, funny, and generous. We then shed the persona of serious, controlling business women. This doesn’t mean we don't take business seriously, but by sharing our unique qualities, we can create an environment of safety in being authentic, expressing love, and thus celebrating and adding to the greater good of all. This can be contagious and improve our workplace.
Loveis the greatest contribution we can make to ourselves, to each other, and to the planet. The impact of love is measurable and yet goes way beyond what is measurable. Our relationships become more harmonious. Whether in a personal or professional capacity, when love speaks, the world hears.
So let’s tap into the Love Vibration and start to make a difference in our lives and those around us.
Let’s take the shackles off our love. It is our greatest asset, so close to who we are as women.
By tapping into the love vibration, we enter into that field of pure potentiality where the powerful, creative energy manifests.
To apply this in your life, start by thinking of a person, place, or thing when you have felt the most love. Remember all the positive aspects, then bring in all of your senses. Feel it, taste it, smell it, hear it, and give it a color. Really anchor that love energy; this is the place of your love vibration. It is from this place where you say it is so, and it becomes reality.
The next time you are about to make a choice, stop, take a breath, and check in. Are you coming from love or unlove, compassion or judgment, pleasure or pain?
We retain experiences based on the energy in which we made our choices. I don't know about you, but I want to experience more joy, love, peace, and abundance in my life and in all my relationships.
Living in the love vibration affects our lives and all those with whom we come in contact. Feel and share the love. Watch your business and life become the things you have only dreamed about. To love or not to love, that is the question.
The answer? It depends on what you want to create!